I was recently challenged about my lack of prayer and why I don't seek God’s advice on the things that happen in my life. It has been something that I have been working on for years. Prayer is something that I have always struggled with and I am yet to work out the root of the issue however the recently challenge may help to sort out some of my misguided thinking about talking to my heavenly Father.
The answer
given to me, that really struck a truth chord, is that I don’t want to know
what God thinks or wants of me because then I have to actively choose whether
to obey. If I don’t ask, then I don’t know
and (theoretically) I can’t get into trouble for doing the wrong thing.
Sigh
Can
I be more wrong?
I am willfully ignorant; I choose not to ask because I don’t want to know the
answer. I don’t like the idea of choosing
to disobey when I don’t like what God wants or feeling guilty when know the
right thing to do but don’t do it. Being
ignorant takes that choice away; the choice to be (or not be) obedient.
It’s
a challenge. I know I HATE doing the
wrong thing. I LIKE being GOOD. But sometimes
that is hard. The right thing can be
painful, hard work or just plain unpleasant.
Father,
I am sorry for avoiding you. I am sorry
that by not seeking after you I am giving myself permission to sin against you.
I am sorry that my selfishness has possibly caused pain for others and more
work for myself. Father, help me to seek
after you, help me to remember to ask you what you would have me do so that I can
follow your will. Help me to choose obedience over willful ignorance.
With much love…
No comments:
Post a Comment